Thoughts In My Head to Relieave You

At 5.30am . I felt everything coalescing into a big cosmic ball inside me. I closed my eyes and the world started to roll. I felt like everything was connected, and I felt good. The world was spinning and the light that was reflected off all shiny surfaces seemed to me to be far too bright. I closed my eyes tighter,which only made me feel even more awesome.

During my delusional world, I had an epiphany. It had to do with falling in love and seeing the world. It's kinda freaky. You can live and enjoy life in Vegas in a mere dream.Dreams take to you to  the world you have dreamt and seen in the movies. I love my dreams.They expose me to what I want.

I think most people in marriages are living in some kind of lie. I think everyone is living in some kind of lie anyway, but most of the time it does not include being in cramped emotional quarters with someone else. The thought it just terrible. Relationships make me feel claustrophobic. I love them, and I love falling in love, but I think the claustrophobia wins out in the end, and I prefer to stay away from anything getting too serious especially if I have no interest. But really, you can't control this shit. You fall in love because  your partner is charming, nice, generous ,great escapades and before you know it, you're seeing each other everyday so you might was well move in together. I have never done this thing ,but so many times ,I see the sister girls and brother boys falling prey. I am not a star , I am just riding with J.


It's bleak really. The odds are stacked against you. About 50% of marriages in the developed world fall apart and end in divorce. Out of the remaining 50%, how many are actually functional?

You're probably thinking, what kind of lame-ace epiphany is that? I already knew all that, it's not a novel revelation. But you know, when you're in an alternate state of mind, you have this feeling like you really get it. I didn't just know that all this tragedy was the truth, I understood it was the truth. That the current system in place is nerd but people still believe in it.

But I'd also like to believe it will change. That people will start seeing things differently and stop lying to themselves and everyone else around them. That they would liquidate their partners so there will be more to go around because as we know, all the best men are taken, except the ones that aren't taken and are about to be taken, so they might as well be.

Just one of those mornings where you lay out your thoughts and feel good in your head. It is a beautiful Day. It reminds of me of one of my favorite jams Beautiful day by U2.

xoxox

Catching Up

25, dear lord, that figure looks awfully large. I still feel like I'm 20. I don't think like I'm 20 though. If I were to go back and give my 20-something self advice it would be this:
1. It doesn't matter what you want to do in the future, or what you will do. Go learn a proper, technical skill and do something to prove you've learned it. It can be anything. Writing, programming, drawing, carpentry, being proficient in multiple languages; anything that you like doing, that's quantifiable, and that will give you a sense of purpose while you're partying and wasting time and money getting a useless university degree. Most university degrees are useless to most people because if you like what you're studying, it'll probably be useless and if it's useful, you'll probably not like it.
2. Self-awareness and discipline are very important for success. Discipline to stick to the road you've decided to go down on, and self-awareness to know when to change course.
3. Live with interesting people that share your interest and are not lazy bums. You'll be inspired all the time, and they will motivate you to succeed.
4. Do some activity as a hobby regularly. read a book,go for a salsa class,catch a swim, cook... it'll make you feel good and it'll teach you something.
5) Don't party when you have to work/study. Unless you're absolutely certain it's going to be epic. Like with people in your field of interest all having a big love in. That way you're also networking.
 ... And yeah, the only thing I regret from that period of my life is the wasted time spent doing shit I didn't want to do.Self advise and that is in the if2 world, if you didn't miss the English grammar class, then you know what I am talking about.

Thoughts of You,

The feeling is fine, the feeling is real

I need you by my side to feel whole for keeps

You ignited and rejuvenated my feelings

I thought I would never feel like this because ninjaresses like me are rare speciesl

Getting the feels like he did took me donkey's years.But, He disappears.

I have quested, all over the world,sailed and reached the four corners,

No see. Thoughts of you baby are driving me insane.

The rubbing of the  bodies , lips dong what hands do brings that lost smile back
Every moment ,It would get  more and more fulfilling with this outrageous feel so incredible to resist,

Touching every curve and every part of me,the legs would apart automatically,misbehaving and begging

I miss you P but I don't know where to find you.Cant you feel the longings of my heart

screaming out for you. Yearning and calling out for you everyday. I want you and

only you in my entirety. This feel is real and genuine in a shape of a diamond.

And the heart such a statement is driven home best.

Sweetheart come take my heart ,hold my hand ,touch my body,look me in the eye

You don't have to say a word. I read hearts through eyes. I write stories through eyes.

Hurry up my love.Sweet love, With every single thought of you my erotic senses rise.

My temps rise, you get me twisting,soaking wet,body shivers. Can't explain the disease.

The only cure to this disease,is P. I want you so bad. Lets get down and sort the situation.

Sweet love,come back, don't disappear on your love. 

xxxxx